Progenitrix: Soror Meral, Mother of the Modern O.T.O.

by Sr. Harper Feist

At Leaping Laughter, we tried to have a women’s group. Last summer and fall, we met haltingly a couple of times, before we realized that many of us really didn’t have another day to be at the lodge. The reasons? Some of us needed to work, some needed time with their family. Others needed Sunday to shop, garden, pickle (really!) and clean. It turned out to be impossible to get very many of us together at one time.

The one meeting that most of us attended was at the Lodge Masters’ house. At that meeting, we proposed to each study about one woman that we each thought had potential to be named a Gnostic Saint, one with Thelemic leanings, and then later share that knowledge with the others. Names from several historical epochs arose: Ida Craddock, St. Theresa of Avila, Ann Bonny the pirate and Katherine the Great. Jane Wolfe and Phyllis Seckler were naturally also mentioned, our true Thelemic grandmothers.

Of all these women, Phyllis, Soror Meral, would have understood best the fate of our women’s group last year. To adapt a phrase, she was the hardest working woman (and quite simply one of the hardest working initiates) in Thelema. She was a member of the Sovereign Sanctuary of the Gnosis in the Ordo Templi Orientis (O.T.O.), a mother, an artist, taught art in a high school and typed many Crowley manuscripts, preserving them for the future. She was a thoughtful student of the occult, a member of both in the A.’.A.’. and the O.T.O., and also very serious about her astrological studies. She founded the College of Thelema , and later warranted the formation of its continuation as the International College of Thelema and the Temple of the Silver Star. In addition, she was also the editor of In the Continuum, the College’s journal, for almost 25 years.

Amidst all this, arguably her most important contribution to the history of our order is that she helped re-birth the O.T.O, which was all but dead in 1969, all the while carrying on her teaching and training, and supporting Grady McMurtry. In the name of the missing women’s group, I’d like to acquaint you with her story.

Phyllis Seckler (neé Pratt) was born on June 18, 1917. Her family moved around a lot when she was young, from Alberta to British Columbia to Seattle and then to Southern California where she graduated from high school in Los Angeles (1935). Shortly after her graduation, she left home following a split with her mother and began to support herself. She also took night classes in drama, where she met Regina Kahl. Regina introduced Phyllis to the Gnostic Mass at Agape Lodge, where she was the presiding Priestess. Attracted primarily by the stimulating people that frequented Agape, she moved in and did housekeeping to help pay her rent.

Regina Kahl, Agape Lodge ca. 1939

These were busy years for Phyllis. She married Paul Seckler, whom she has also met during the drama classes in 1938. In 1939, she received her Minerval and I* initiations. In June 1940, she was admitted as a Probationer in the A.’.A.’. under Jane Wolfe, the only member of Agape lodge to have studied personally with Crowley. She was at that time also studying astrology with Fredrick Mellinger. When the lodge moved from LA to Pasadena, the Secklers were founding members, along with Mellinger, Wilfred Smith, Wolfe, Kahl, Joe and Grace Miller, Jack Parsons and Betty Northrup. It should be said that the Secklers were not always happy with the “inconsiderateness” of the household. The one statement that sources agree with about Agape Lodge is that it was a pretty wild place. At that time, it was also the only operating O.T.O lodge in the world.

Painfully, Phyllis was invited to leave the Agape house in 1942 because of the behavior of her eldest daughter, who was a reactive child, and prone to screaming fits. Later, the daughter, Stella, was diagnosed as partially deaf, explaining the disturbing nature of her childhood. Phyllis settled briefly into a cabin in Fallbrook, later into a small apartment in Los Angeles. In spite of her insensitive treatment at the hands of the Agape members, she remained, however, loyal to both the O.T.O. and A.’.A.’.continuing to study with Jane.

During the Agape years, Soror Meral helped keep Crowley in the loop with respect to the goings-on at Agape with letters and cartoons, primarily of the inhabitants of the house, something Crowley appreciated. She was not universally valued, though, as this excerpt from a letter to Jack Parsons from Crowley reveals. 19 October 1943 “… (5) I very strongly disapprove of your description of Phyllis Seckler as an indigent cook. I know nothing of her financial status, and have never been subjected to her cooking, but from my personal knowledge she is an admirable psychologist and an extremely clever artist. The information that she has supplied has been more illuminating than the total of what I have had from other sources…” [1] The very next day, Crowley wrote to Seckler herself, “You have all the courage and all the common sense necessary to pull you through. I will only remark that, whatever anyone else may say, you have in me a sincere friend and admirer: on me you may always rely, if ever you need me.” [2]

When Crowley died in 1947, Germer took over as head of the O.T.O. and A.’.A.’. As such, he received all of Crowley’s book and writings and literary effects under his title as the Grand Treasurer General of the O.T.O. He received 3 tons of materials from England that he kept at various addresses until his death in California. While he was still in NJ, Phyllis wrote to him with her concern that some of the unpublished works of Crowley would be lost unless some copies were made. She typed Liber 418, “The Vision and the Voice,” “Magick Without Tears” and a portion of Crowley’s confessions.

Germer was principally concerned with protecting Crowley’s literary heritage, and not on growing or administering to the Order. During his leadership, besides advancing those who were already in the order, there were no new initiations. [3]

In the mid-1950s, Agape Lodge finally failed. At this time, Seckler was still typing and editing Crowley’s work for Germer. She finished a Master’s degree in art at UCLA in 1955 and began work as an art teacher at a high school in Livermore. Germer confirmed in a letter written around this time Phyllis’ status as an Adeptus Minor (5°-6°) in the A:.A:..[4] She was also advanced to IX° of the O.T.O. by Germer, including instructions in the central mysteries of the Order.

At the same time, Grady McMurtry gathered some Agape folks in California with the goal of trying to convince Germer to resume initiations. There was agreement on this in the short term, but then the two men argued over issues related to a personal loan. Shortly after this in 1961, McMurtry lost his job in California and moved to Washington D.C., began teaching at George Washington University and worked as a management analyst for the U.S. government. [5]

Germer died in 1962 from prostate cancer, although this fact was kept from the community for years, in part because his wife Sasha did not trust the members of the O.T.O. During the time between Germer’s death and widespread recognition of it, Crowley’s magical implements and private notebooks were stolen from Sasha Germer’s house. In 1969, Seckler and McMurtry shared a series of letter where they planned to revitalize Thelemic activity in the US. Seckler’s initial plan was to start a Thelemic college, but then she discovered that McMurtry had been appointed by Crowley as Caliph after Germer’s death. Seckler then paid for McMurtry to go to California to support the reactivation of the O.T.O. It appears that Phyllis supported Grady financially throughout this period, until finally she asked him to find lodgings in Berkeley.

Figure 2 - Phyllis Seckler 

(Soror Meral)

in the early 2000s.

Seckler, McMurtry and Mildred Burlingame (of Agape Lodge) reinaugurated the O.T.O. in July 1969, with the first initiation being performed at a park near the Russian River. Phyllis’ concern that very few of these people went on to I* has been documented. She resolved to mitigate the ignorance about Crowley and his writings.

In 1973, Phyllis started the College of Thelema (COT) and began to edit and publish Into The Continuun, a project she pursued for 25 years afterward. She saw the COT as a much-needed source of preparatory instruction for aspirants to the A.’.A.’., having seen too many students fail due to a lack of training in the basics. She also continued her initiatory and instructional work within the A.’.A.’. itself.

Phyllis retired from teaching art in 1975, and gave herself more completely to Thelemic activities. She worked with McMurtry until his death in 1985. In 1979, she was granted a charter for 418 Lodge. The Temple of Thelema – an initiatory branch of COT - was founded in the late 1980s, patterned after the structure and curriculum of the Hermetic Order of the Golden Dawn.

It goes almost without saying that the organizations founded or administered by Soror Meral have produced students of very high caliber – including David Shoemaker, James Eshelman, Gregory Peters and Lon Milo DuQuette.

Soror Meral led 418 Lodge from its inception until her death in 2004, founded organizations that are important in the promulgation of Thelema, and helped resuscitate an O.T.O. that came very close to being lost in the 1960s. I believe that our beloved grandmother would well understand the struggles of our Women’s Group, and also presents us with an ambitious and tenacious FEMALE role model, a thing very useful and important in today’s Order.

References

1. Red Flame 11, “Jane Wolfe, her life with Aleister Crowley, Part II” Red Flame Productions, Berkeley CA, 2003. ISBN 0-9712376-3-8 (p 55).

2. Private correspondence, ICOT archives.

3. Private correspondence between Germer and Wolfe, ICOT archives.

4. Private correspondence, ICOT archives.

5. Oto-usa.org/oto/history/#crowley

Further Reading

1. Shoemaker, D., G. Peters and R. Johnson, Eds “Phyllis Seckler (Soror Meral) – The Thoth Tarot, Astrology & Other Selected Writings,” The Teitan Press, 2010. ISBN 978-0-933429-19-2.

2. Shoemaker, D., G. Peters and R. Johnson, Eds “Phyllis Seckler (Soror Meral) – The Kabbalah, Magick, and Thelema” The Teitan Press, 2012. ISBN 978-0-933429-4.

3. Red Flame 10, “Jane Wolfe, her life with Aleister Crowley, Part I” Red Flame Productions, Berkeley CA, 2003. ISBN 0-9712376-2-X.

A Bishop-induced OTO Epiphany: The EGC is...

A few weeks ago, I went to a conference in Florida called "A Gathering of Bishops." Sherri, the local Body Master at Hidden Spring Oasis put it all together with her local lodge mates, and she did an awesome job*.

Tau Asteria, Tau Ce Acatl, and Tau Iatromantis were in attendance** and presented on several topics related to their roles as Bishops within the Ecclesia Gnostica Catholica (EGC), their roles as Soverign Grand Inquisitors General in the Mysteria Mystica Maxima (M∴M∴M∴), and examinations of aspects of the Gnostic Mass (Liber XV), including the Eucharist, the role of the Priestess, and the relationship between the roles of the mass and the congregants at large.

Their presentations were direct, balanced, and pragmatic, and I don't think anyone who attended walked away without picking up something useful and interesting that made their enjoyment of the rituals of initiation and celebration that we share more meaningful.

I had a mild epiphany at this event, and I've been digesting it to make sure it's properly absorbed before I talk about it publicly. I ALSO want to make sure to distance my own take-aways from the Bishops who attended:

I am not saying this is what they meant, or intended me to hear, or even said explicitly. This is my presentation of my personal conclusions, reached after hanging out with these guys for a weekend and hearing what they had to say, about the OTO, the EGC, the M∴M∴M∴, the Mass, and the people who make this happen.

Aumgn Aumgn Aumgn.

Ok? Ok.

So before I get to the epiphany, here's my experience of the OTO and EGC:

Me: I'm a Hermetic magician who thinks Crowley was awesome, but had a tendency to over-complicate things. I've found in Hermetic magick the cure to what ails us all, self-empowerment, self-actualization, and the ability to tap into the full reserves we're all born with using a relatively simple symbol-set; four elements, seven planets, one circle of stars, and some mysterious junk out past the stars that you can spend lifetimes enjoying.

My experience in OTO has been great. We get together, we talk magick, we drink, we do initiations, we have conferences, and everyone has a good time. When I say "We," I mean the lodge folk, who are magicians familiar with the Hermetic model of magick, in our own way. We have good speaks and help each other out. We talk about how we do magick, and how our results are coming along. We teach those with less experience about the tools we use personally, if they're interested.

My experience in the EGC has also been great, I was Baptised at Thelesis and a Soror Amy zapped me right proper, and I still have petals from the rose that I use in rites. I was confirmed at Hidden Spring (THANKS LEANNE, I'm fine now). I served as Child in the Mass, then Deacon, received ordination as Deacon, and now am serving as Priest in the Mass, with caveats*** because I haven't been ordained yet. Working on it though.

But after three years of doing this, I couldn't finish the sentence:

"The OTO [or] EGC is _____________________."

And that bothered me.

But problem solved, thanks to the good Bishops!

So T. Iatromantis (David Shoemaker) kicked off with a talk about the Mass, and how to use it as a magickal act as a participant/congregant. Then T. C Acatl (Craig Berry) followed up with a talk on the Sacraments of the EGC. Then T. Asteria went did some back-to-back talks about the role of the Priestess and the role of the Eucharist, specifically the Cakes of Light. And then they did a panel discussion where they barely even looked like victims of a firing squad as 20 people rapid-fired questions at them from around the room.

It was amazing, and we're typing up the notes to share. These guys are awesome, the M∴M∴M∴ is awesome, and the EGC is awesome, and that's why I'm writing this. Because without any one of them taking me aside and telling me straight up, "Hey Josh-Rufus, THIS IS WHAT THE OTO IS ALL ABOUT," they managed to do so cumulatively in a way that makes sense to me, and I'm sort of still a little bit high on it.

And anyone who's looked at the US Grand Lodge Web Site on OTO initiation can probably just sit back and laugh at me after they read this, because it's all right there.

But let's start with the Mass.

The Mass is super cool, and it's the symbolic formula of the all the rites of our Order, and everyone who's taken a minute to listen to OTO podcasts probably has heard several high ranking Duquettes and others speak about the magickal formula embodied in the mass. I've talked to enough magician-members of the Order after mass to know that a lot of us understand that we can think of a thing we want to happen throughout the mass to make it manifest. I'm simplifying, there's tech involved, but not a lot more than that.

T. Iatromantis' teaching on it this time was a little deeper, a little more personal. He used the magick words "Thought-Word-Deed" to explain that the mass itself is a Hermetic rite. It gives everyone an opportunity to take a THOUGHT, materialize it symbolically through WORD, and then to manifest as a DEED. And he took us through it twice in different ways, I realized something amazing:

THE GNOSTIC MASS GIVES ALL ATTENDEES A CHANCE TO PARTICIPATE AS A HERMETIC MAGICIAN IN THE CREATION AND MANIFESTATION OF THEIR LIVES.

All caps because it's important. Everyone who just shows up can do magick. No initiation required, no years of magical practice, no memorized columns of correspondences, no ability to draw a tree of life from memory.

No conjuration of angels or demons, either. You just show up, and do magick via participation.

Think about what you want. Symbolize it. Hold that symbol in mind. Speak it into being, because THERE IS NO PART OF YOU THAT IS NOT OF THE GODS. Then follow through, take advantage of the opportunities that come your way when you tap into it.

Thought+Word+Deed=MAGICK.

It's Hermetics! The Gnostic Mass is HERMETICS! (cue soylent green camera effects)

So the Mass is a chance for everyone, regardless of attainment, to participate in Hermetic Magick. That was part one of my epiphany. And the EGC is, in my opinion, primarily responsible for putting on the Mass. The official public presentations of the Mass will, with very rare exceptions, include at least an EGC Ordained Priest or Priestess as either Priest, Priestess, or Deacon.

But what else?

T. Ce Acatl was up next, and spoke about the sacraments, specifically the sacraments of marriage, and of death. As he spoke, he talked about how the rites in the EGC are founded around the fundamental understanding that the source of power that is being outwardly structured and affirmed is within you, putting you in the position to realize the only "divinity" being called on is yourself. He picked up on a metaphor T. Iatromantis had used, that as you go along in your work, you are becoming more and more focused, like a light that starts out shining in every direction slowly over time becoming more and more focused until it was a laser.

Now all this happened to be a confirmation of what I learned over years and years of Hermetic studies outside of these OTO Orders. I limited my occult Work to sources betwen the first and third centuries EV, with a lot of framing from Agrippa. I eschewed all the 1899 EV and later "occult" teachings at the time, but since then I have come to realize that everything I learned in those studies of the source texts is also presented in the teachings of the OTO.

Not to get ahead of myself though.

The next day, T. Asteria took the lead and spoke about the role of the Priestess, guidelines on official stances, where there's room to wiggle, and her personal expectations of the Priestesses she oversees as Bishop. Then she spoke on the development of the Cakes of Light, and the myths, the magick, and the mysteries surrounding them.

In each discussion, she presented very practical advice, based on experience. She dealt with pretty specific topics in a frank and earnest way, with facts laid out, anecdotes, and conclusions she's reached on the different aspects of the topic at hand. And she addressed things across the whole spectrum of the experiences, from Tree of Life interpretations of the roles of the Mass teams, to how to deal with ... overzealous Priests reinterpreting the script without letting you know ahead of time.

They were all like that, honestly. Attending this conference was just like going to a professional seminar, or a college level class on the kinds of things we can expect to experience as we do the OTO thing that we do. A lot of it was a discussion on advanced topics that you run into when you're doing Magick in public with other people, who also do Magick. Another part of it was how to deal with people who might be working with different images and at different levels of understanding and experience in a group rite.

But every part of what they were teaching provided a way to do the OTO thing we do that meets everyone where they're at. Giving them what they need, so they could do Magick.

And I started hearing a theme in everything they were talking about, whether it was individual  roles in the Mass, the Mass itself as a whole operation, their own roles in the M∴M∴M∴ and the EGC, the things they do as Bishops, about being extensions of the sovereignty of the King, the other hats they wear in service to the OTO ...

Everything they do and teach is about how to become an effective Magician, and then how to become an even more effective Magician. And then the people we interact with through the various aspects of the OTO can learn to accomplish their True Will and attain happiness. And then that makes the whole world a better place for everyone at the same time.

You know... they do the Great Work.

The Summum Bonum.

And it hit me, the OTO hosts and presents the Mass so that everyone else who attends can do Magick. And if they don't understand how to do that, the OTO teaches what that means, over time, in small bites, within a specific context.

They make magicians!

In the Mass anyone can participate in Magick. All the principles are there that I spent years researching in ancient papyri and Renaissance grimories. Four elements, Seven Wandering Planets, a Circle of Stars, and the underlying Mysteries of the Eighth and Ninth Spheres, the stages of incarnation, the Hermetic Secret that thou art god, in a way...

It's all right there, laid out for anyone. You don't even have to understand it to get to benefit from it.

Learning that stuff changed my life. It took me from a place where I was simply responding to events in my life as a victim to a place where I am able to create the events of my life. I went from being a victim to an effective human being, able to change the world as I saw fit (without screwing it up for anyone else) because I had gained a deep and personal relationship with the occult forces that manifest the world. It took a long time to understand these basic Hermetic principles, and I was quite proud of myself for figuring it out. I had dreams of bringing the freedom and empowerment of Hermetic philosophy to the world.

Imagine my surprise finding out that there's already an organized body of people working globally to give this same opportunity to everyone else who's interested?

So my epihany then... I think I'd phrase it this way:

The OTO and EGC are the best vehicle available today for transmitting the Hermetic principles that made me an effective human being. We provide a means for all humans, regardless of our exposure to occult principles to learn the Thought-Word-Deed manifestation process that Hermetics has tried to teach for millenia. These organizations create Magicians who can become their own masters in life.

Now for the "no-shit, sherlock" moment I mentioned earlier about the Initiation page on the (well-indexed and organized) US Grand Lodge wb site.

Look at the names of the First, Second, and Third Degrees of the OTO:

I*   Woman and Sister / Man and Brother
II*  Magician
III* Master Magician

As you progress through the OTO, you go from Woman/Man to Magician to Master Magician.

It took me WAY TOO LONG to figure that out.

* It's worth noting, OTO folk, that people who want to make things happen are making things happen. If you want things to happen, like a bishop event at your local lodge, make it happen. There are bishops. They will show up. With valuable experiences and interpretations. And bullet points.

** Christeos Pir was scheduled to attend and present something about the growth of local bodies that I really wish I'd gotten to see, but he couldn't make it. I'm still looking forward to hearing his presentation though, it looked like it had some meatiness to it. He kind of owes us now, I think.

*** Warning: Near-flawless Greek, still thinking lewd thoughts about Harper most of the time, and that second-step speech, I just ... sigh.

Online Repositories of Wisdom that make a Difference in the World of Magicians

When I started out researching grimoire magic, I found references to Joseph Peterson's Esoteric Archives, perhaps the most comprehensive site on the entire internet for magicians looking for scholarly presentations of the grimoire texts that form the basis of the Western Magical Tradition.

I delved deep into the footnotes, the commentaries, and the practical wisdom Joseph collected, and I was able to find a way to do some pretty cool shit as a result. I accomplished some of the more astounding goals of Hermetic Magic as a result of his research, insight, painstaking footnotes, and amazing scholarly dedication to presenting information publicly for people like me.

Fast forward almost a decade, and I found myself all of a sudden drawn into the web of the A:.A:. and the OTO. Babalon had me by the short curlies, and dragged me into the warp and weave of Thelema. I needed something similar to the Esoteric Archives so I could catch up with my partner in the Work at hand.

I was fortunate to find the Hermetic Library at Hermetic.com.

There are plenty of sites out there that host bits and pieces of the collected writings of Aleister Crowley, but by far the most comprehensive and useful repository I've found is Hermetic.com. I am not exaggerating at all when I say the only reason I was able to join the A:.A:. was because that site has the most comprehensive collection of hard-to-find and currently-out-of-publication texts required for the curriculum of that particular organization. I made extensive use of Google's site:hermetic.com [search term] feature as I spent about a year working through the preliminary texts. I still call on that site at least once or twice a week to continue my studies and practices.

When I took the step of beginning my priestly duties in the Gnostic Mass, I had Sabazius' version of the mass on my phone for quick reference at every practice, and in the tomb before going live. I've read through Tau Polyphilus' commentaries, Sabazius' profiles of the Saints, Beth Kimbell's recipe for Cakes of Light, and of course the Abramelin Ramble of Bill Heidrick, a thing everyone aspiring to K&CHGA should read. Achad's ... interesting speculations and insights are available at the click of a mouse.

Hermetic.com is an awesome resource for Thelemites, for sure...

But wait, there's more!

The Hermetic Library, while housing the world's most extensive and well-organized online texts of the works of Aleister Crowley, is also home to some of the most important work that's come out of the Western Occult Tradition in the last 100 years. The works of Austin Osman Spare, the grandfather of "Chaos Magick" are housed there. Norton's Imperium, and the writings of Benjamin Rowe can be found there.

Yes, that Benjamin Rowe.

I've recently had the good fortune to work with the Librarian at that particular treasure trove on a project for an upcoming event that I can't talk about in great detail yet, and it turns out the guy hosting Hermetic.com is amazing in real life too. He's not just "internet awesome," he's a good dude.

If you haven't been there, you're missing out. If you haven't been there lately, what have you even been doing? The site has a ton of useful stuff that you probably should be reading, referencing, and integrating into your practice as a Thelemite.

And you should also be supporting the site financially, because the Law ain't promulgatin' itself.

Well, technically it is.

But Hermetic.com makes it easier for everyone called to this stuff.

Speaking of the Legacy of Jane Wolfe...

Today's post focuses primarily on one aspect of Jane and Phyllis's legacy, and how you can help it continue to manifest, right now. I had planned on waiting to make this post until after the Seckler post was ready, but with NOTOCON, and the Wolfe post turning into actual research, everything takes longer than anticipated, and I'm running out of time to talk about this important opportunity to support the Wolfe legacy. 

TL;DR - Jane's student Meral (Seckler) saw a gap between modern American students and Crowley's ideal A.'.A.'. students, and she put together a bridge for the gap called the College of Thelema, now the International College of Thelema (ICOT).

They need money to get space, and they have an Indiegogo campaign in process at this link. Time's running out, and now's the best time to give.

Now keep reading, motherfuckers, I put time into this.

In the previous post, I talked about Jane Wolfe and her lasting legacy to the A.'.A.'. and the OTO. The next post, currently being written by my partner Harper Feist, will explore how her legacy continued to influence the modern manifestations of the Orders through her A.'.A.'. student Soror Meral (Phyllis Seckler).

The Legacy in Brief:

• Jane taught Phyllis A.'.A.'. stuff.
• Phyllis did the A.'.A.'. stuff, and it worked.
• Karl Germer corresponded with Phyllis about A.'.A.'. stuff.
• Karl told Jane Phyllis was 5=6, and intimated the same to Phyllis in gentler words.
• Phyllis pursued her HGA, and went about manifesting things as she saw fit. Like a boss.

One of the things she saw fit to do was inspired by the number of people she saw who came to her to follow the curriculum of the A.'.A.'. who were completely unprepared to handle it. The A.'.A.'. stuff Crowley put together isn't that hard, really, and it isn't that big of a deal when you've been given a complete 19th century private education based on the Trivium and the Classical Educational Model. It's actually an extension of that educational training, focused on the esoteric, mystical, and mathematical aspects of the magical arts.

Seckler, a High School English teacher in California, was painfully aware of the fact that at 18, Aleister Crowley had more academic education under his belt than 99.999% of American students. She understood that the A.'.A.'. curriculum was going to be about impossible for most folks to succeed at, given the tools and training they got from a public education. 

At the same time, she understood that people needed to receive Thelema wherever they were at. Some people needed more help, a more structured organized approach to the concepts and libers of the A.'.A.'. materials than they could get from the traditional model of the A.'.A.'. process. She put together a study course to prepare people who weren't able to apply the discipline and practice of the classsical education model to the syllabus of the A.'.A.'. on their own, never having been exposed to it. It was intended to increase the success of participants in the practices of the A.'.A.'..

She formed the College of Thelema, which over the years has morphed into the International College of Thelema (ICOT), a non-profit religious and educational organization based on the principles of Thelema. It was founded in service to the A∴A∴, under warrant from Phyllis Seckler (Soror Meral), to provide preparatory training in ceremonial magick, Raja Yoga, Qabalah, Tarot, Astrology, and much more.

Today, led by David Shoemaker, the International College of Thelema continues to provide aspirants with the opportunity to receive instruction in the tenets of Thelema in a way that prepares them to succeed in their Summum Bonum. 

In pursuit of advancing this effort, the ICOT is currently raising funds to expand their physical footprint, and to provide a facility to continue the legacy of Jane Wolfe and Phyllis Seckler. Check out their Indiegogo campaign for further details. This is the chance you have, right now, to contribute to the ongoing manifestation of the legacy of our Progenitrix:

https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/international-college-of-thelema-hq-event-center#/story

Progenitrix: The Jane Wolfe Legacy

In the next couple of posts, I'm going to be introducing a couple of the women of the A:.A:. and the OTO that are being spoken of less and less in our modern discourse of the history of our Orders. There is a movement afoot to restore these ladies to their rightful positions as the central core of the OTO that kept it alive through the darkest of times, often in spite of the men who held the official reins of the Order.

I'd like to begin with Jane Wolfe. Her Wikipedia entry provides the basic overview of her biographical data, and is in itself a testament to her strength in the early 20th century.

Born in Pennsylvania in fucking 1875, she left home to pursue a career in New York City.

Full stop.

Think about that, for a second. Pennsylvania Dutch farm folk are pretty practical people. They are born with dirt under their nails. Hearth and home, family, finding a strong farmer man to have babies with to continue the prosperity of the community, these are the primary values ingrained in these people from the womb.

But not her. She got some business skills, and took off to New York City.

What kind of 19th century farm girl does that? She not only knew what she wanted (NOT FARMERS), but she had the courage and the audacity to take a huge risk to pursue her will. She wasn't someone who had never thought about doing what she needed to do to get her world to align with her aspirations before she met Crowley. She was a born Thelemite.

And she didn't fail, guys. She succeeded. She found herself in despair over the mess her parents had made of her upbringing, and to combat that pursued a career on stage. She didn't wallow in her issues, she instead found a treatment that was opposed to the symptoms she was feeling. She couldn't express how she felt in her daily life, so she threw herself into a place where she would have to express feelings she had no other outlet to express.

She built herself a career on stage, but eventually she smelled that there was something new in the world, that things were changing. She understood the power of film, and how that was going to change the world. She followed her instinct, and relocated to California and became one of the first movie stars, in the silent film industry.

She could have continued in that, getting roles, building up her IMDB.com stats, and making all the money she wanted, but it wasn't enough. Like the rest of us, she had a hunger. She attacked the world, sucked out the marrow of all things material, achieved stardom and celebrity status, and she was still unsatisfied.

Her understanding of the changing focus from theater to film is indicative of another thing: she sensed and responded to the change of the Aeon. She recognized the potential of film, the shift in focus before anyone else did, and she made her place in the new frontier, carving it out and dominating her niche.

She was drawn to the occult, and like so many of us, got off to a bad start. She got hooked up with the roots of the New Age movement of her day, and began dabbling in automatic writing, and trusting the channeled instructions of a man who claimed to represent her guides. Deeper into the miasma she went, until she suffered a breakdown, shouting on th eset of a Cecil B. DeMille film, "It is God, it is Illujmination!" After some time in a sanitarium, she began clawing her way back to normalcy, and, having gotten her hands on a copy of the Equinox, she began writing to Aleister Crowley.

He quickly set her on the path of Scientific Illuminism, teaching her to question every spirit and disembodied Master that came through the pen, or the ouija board, or the sensitive weak-minded channelers in her life. In time he convinced her to join him in Cefalu, and packing up her things, she took the step that led her to living Thelema.

On June 30, 1920, she wrote in her diary, "In Bou-Sada, alone." The woman who left Pennsylvania to pursue a career on Broadway, the woman who left that to pursue a career in film, left everything behind once again to explore a completely different experience: life with Aleister Crowley.

She staid at Cefalu until it closed, living the life of the A.'.A.'. student the way Crowley intended it. She spent a year studying and practicing, recording her results, and submitted them to Crowley. Her typed diary entires and his handwritten response are available today from this link. Everyone should read them, the insights into how he taught his students, the things he had them do, his self-assessment made in passing is so useful to us now. Seeing the way the methods of the modern A.'.A.'. continue his on-site and in-person system and tradition is awesome.

After Cefalu, things unraveled quickly for the Beast. Jane became an integral force for carrying on the current, and Crowley referred to her as the "spearhead" in the effort to re-establish an Abbey of Thelema. After much sturm and drang, and ordeal after ordeal, she returned to the States, continuing her work to advance Thelema in the world.

This time period of the A.'.A.'. and the OTO was, quite frankly, just awful. Crowley wrote regularly how desperate they were for cash. Jane's health was deteriorating, but she continued to support the Work as best she could with the people she had available.

As the years went by, the men of the early years of the A.'.A.'. and the OTO came and went, leaving behind the names and anecdotes we recall today. C.F. Russell, Charles Stansfield Jones, Willfred T. Smith, Jack Parsons, she was there through them all, and remained after they were gone. At Crowley's acknowledgement of her rise to Neophyte, Jane took on Phyllis Seckler as her Probationer in the A.'.A.'., passing on the teachings and traditions she received at Cefalu. She worked tirelessly and continuously in the establishment and maintenance of Agape Lodge in the US, and at the time the lodge closed, she was the sitting Body Master.

Her life was not one of many joys, easy successes, or financial prosperity. When she died, it was said she died from sheer exhaustion. Doing the research into the ife of Jane Wolfe was pretty terrible. I read letters in the Red Flame editions of Jane Wolfe's life with Crowley (available from Conjoined Creations at this link), and it was like immersing myself into a frantic stream of frustration, annoyance, and what we'd call pure and unadulterated abuse by today's standards.

Yet at the same time, I read her diaries and her commentaries, and in spite of the frenetic horse shit she had to deal with month after month, year after year in the birth pains of the modern Thelemic orders, she kept careful notes of her practices and experiences. She found moments of peace, bliss, and ecstasy. She found a calm center from which to move the foundations of the Earth as it welcomed the New Aeon. She was a proto-feminist, recording that some might accuse her of "suffragette syndrome," yet she never considered Aleister Crowley above her in any way, but always considered the man her equal.

She remains a great role model for our tradition, a quiet fighter who faced madness, ridicule, and the light of the divine alike, and staid her ground. It was undoubtedly her work that laid the foundation for Grady McMurtry and Phyllis Seckler to re-birth the OTO after the death of Karl Germer.

What's RO doing in a Thelemic Order or Two?

93!

After nearly thirty years of studying the occult, and at LEAST seven years of doing real magic, I finally got around to joining the A.'.A.'. and the OTO in ... 2012? 2013?

Definitely one of those.**

At the time, I had just completed the Philosopher's Stone using ancient Hermetic technologies, and I was consequently thoroughly blissed out by the energies released at its formation. I was seeing goddesses and tasting the nectar of the Holy One on a weekly basis. I was deep in the throes of "Insufferable Prickitis," a malady I first saw described by Aleister Crowley in his notes on Liber Samekh*.

I got better, mostly.

A looooooooong time before that, my good friend BJ Swain invited me to see him perform as Priest in the Gnostic Mass at the OTO. For years we had been unable to interact personally in the flesh because he had been friends with my first ex-wife, and my second ex-wife was afraid I'd ... I don't know, talk to him and all of a sudden leave her to be with a woman I didn't like who'd left me for another magician? It didn't make a lot of sense to me, but to keep her happy ("Happy wife, happy life," right?) I never hung out with BJ.

It probably didn't help that he was a somewhat prominent member in the local solar-phallic sex cult that did public performances of the Gnostic Mass with polyamorous beautiful nekkid Priestesses on the regular. She was insecure about that stuff too.

So when we finally divorced, one of the first things I did was go to a mass... of course. 

Now understand, I'd read the mass. It's online for everyone to see. I knew it was sex magick, and knowing BJ as the lusty fellow he is, I went into the rite with certain ... expectations. 

Sexy expectations. 

When it said, "The Priest Adores," I was like, aww hell yea, the Priest is totally gonna get it on! 

I saw the obvious magick going on throughout the script. I saw the Opening of the Mouth ceremony, the anointing and empowerment of the man-god, the anointing and obeisance of the woman-god, the necromantic conjurations of the dead, the creation of what Wiccans would turn into the Great Rite, and the ultimate ecstatic culmination of the transubstantiation of the host and the wine, and ... 

It was totally THANATEROS turned up to fucking 11, man!  

I couldn't wait.

And so I went to the mass. 

And of course, it was a disaster. 

The deacon didn't have the priest's robe, cap, and crown. When the part of the ceremony came where they were required, slapstick hilarity ensued. The deacon ran up to the altar, and there were no robes. He ran into the back room where the mass gear and childrens' robes are stored, and we heard lots of rustling, the banging of boxes, and muffled cursing. He returned to the temple, the whites of his eyes showing completely around the irises, carrying no robes. He left the temple and went to the common area, where again the sounds of cabinets opening and closing came to us, and he again came back to the temple, bearing no robes.

Through all these shenanigans, the Priestess remained kneeling before the Priest in a pose that was absolutely beatific. BJ, dressed in his white togs, held the lance stoically. If he felt like murdering his past self for not making sure all was ready, I sure couldn't tell. They breathed in, they breathed out, and held the sacred space as the deacon scurried frantically in his search.

At last, he returned to the storage room, and did the unthinkable: he turned on the light. Today I remember hearing "Ah HA!" shouted jubilantly from the room, but I might be making shit up. It happens. However, I will never forget seeing the lights in the little back room shut off and the deacon emerging, shining very much like the Sun with a smile from ear to ear, the robes, cap, and crown held triumphantly above his head in one hand.

Proudly he strode to the Priestess, handing her the clothes, and she robed BJ right up. 

Everything was going great at that point, if a little stilted, and it was time for the Priestess to be shut up behind the veil. My palms were a little sweaty, I admit. The Priestess was lovely, and the idea of her being all nekkid and, ahem, you know, "adored" (nudge nudge wink wink, knowhatImean?) had me as worried about a public hard-on as a 14 year old at the pool. I understood after the sex magick we got to approach her and take communion. I didn't want to be sporting a tent.

And then he opened the veil, and ... 

I couldn't see hardly anything. She was naked, sure, but with the smoke and the candles, I could sort of make out where a nipple might have been, and it was of course beautiful, and tasteful, but it wasn't quite what I'd expected. When BJ finally got to the adoration, he kissed her knees, respectfully. Calmly. Sedately. 

He was obviously in another place and I could feel him doing some magickal something, but this was NOT THE CUNNILINGUS I HAD EXPECTED.

I was like, ok, I sort of maybe don't get it.

Then he said some stuff in Greek, and did a mass. Like, a real mass. With bread, and wine, and showing the congregation the stuff and holding it up, and at one point the Deacon rang a bell, and at another point they breathed on it and said Hriliu, and then he did his thing, and then it was our turn and I was like, ok, let's do this.

And I approached the Dais.

And I didn't have an embarrassing hard on.

And I was handed a Cake of Light.

And I took a (the LARGEST) glass of wine (I'D EVER HAD IN MY LIFE).

And I put the bread (cakes of light) in my mouth, and I chewed it up.

And I chewed it.

And I chewed. And chewed. And chewed.

I don't understand exactly how it happened, but apparently all the saliva glands in my mouth chose this particular moment to go on strike, or on vacation, or at the very least to begin their very own private reproduction of "The Gobi Desert, as Seen in a Mouth." It might have been some psychological response to the Mystery of Ingredient X, or it might have been stage fright because I hadn't done a public mass ever and I was sure everyone was watching me chew, slowly, and judging, or it might have been just one of those things that just happens. 

Whatever, it was the driest moment of my life.

My Mouth on Cakes of Light

At last I remembered I had a glass of wine in my left hand, and I SUDDENLY KNEW why it was so big! I drank, and drank, and drank, and at last the crusty paste in my mouth went down, and I could even begin to consider the formation of words with parched tongue and teeth, as soon as I finished the wine, because yeah, I'd been drinking a while, and there was STILL A LOT LEFT.

Betty White visited William Blake Lodge

At last I finished swallowing the bread, and the wine, and I got rid of the glass, and I assumed the position, facing the priestess with my arms crossed, right over left in the form of Osiris Risen, and I knew I could say it, and I took a breath, looked up at her in her splendour, ready to say the words...

And then time stopped. It was like I was frozen. I could feel the particles of cakes in my mouth, here and there, taste the red wine remnants on my tongue. I saw 22 candles whose flames had stopped flickering, smelled the perfume of a dozen roses, and to this day I remember her ankles were crossed as I moved my awareness up to look at her... and then she disappeared.

I could see the altar, and the outline of my Priestess. But where she had sat, there was only a deep darkness, a black silhouette, and in a moment I realized that it was full of stars. 

And for a time, I communed with infinity, open and receptive, receiving and responding. There was a transfer between us, a current that flowed, and information was exchanged. I don't know what She got from me, but sometimes as I am falling asleep, I can sense a part of me processing what She gave me, prising it apart, teasing out the details.

The moment passed, and I recovered myself a bit, and at last was able to both know and to say:

THERE IS NO PART OF ME THAT IS NOT OF THE GODS.

In that moment, I was shown an aspect of divinity that changed my life completely. No joke or symbol set were Nuit or Hadit, but actual deities whose reality and influence and intent upon the Earth would not be denied. I became a convert in that moment, and the seeds of my zealousy were planted, by the hands of a blue lidded daughter of night.

Within a month, I met a woman with red hair and a sparkle in her eyes that changed everything I knew about life and relationships. It was a wonderful time, and she just happened to be going through the Man of Earth initiations, and had also just happened to have submitted her application to the A.'.A.'., and she suggested I might consider doing so myself.

It was a merry adventure, and I'll go into some more details in other posts. Suffice it to say, I found the A.'.A.'. and the OTO to my liking.

The people are AMAZING. I've never had fellowship like this. I met a couple I trust to be the godparents of my kids, which is saying something. I don't even LIKE other people. I hang out with people I disagree with utterly, and we make fun of each other. I get to pick the brains of the heirs of the Hawk and Jackal system of magick. I get to learn Hebrew calligraphy, and do kundalini yoga exercises, and study traditional astrology, and teach Hermetics, and play pinball, and drink tequila, and talk magick with the best besotted minds of our generation.

The gods are INTENSE. I've dealt with Pan, Hadit, Nuit, Babalon, and some Egyptian scrubs who will get their own posts eventually. The Crowley-based methods of interacting with them produce a set of results that are not like conjurations of spirits, nor like the manifestations of the gods you get in the Orphic Hymns. It's something else, and it's something cool, and it's something useful, but it will take a lot more words.

The wine is NOT BAD. Leaping Laughter Lodge is the base camp of the Dionysian Chapter, so we get really fuckin' great wine a lot of the time, and boxed not bad wine for the rest of the time. Having the local Bishops be the hosts of the biennial wine tasting at NOTOCON has its privileges. We get to taste the good stuff before everyone else. Suck it, you jealous bitches.

And the parties...

So I get to hang out with Frater Barabbas at his country estate every couple of months, and he has the most AWESOME PARTIES guys! He and his lovely wife Joni are great hosts. Imagine hanging out in a great library, wandering over to the Temple all fully charged, and there's cats, while talking to Barabbas about Enochian and Goetic conjurations over a glass of iced home-made bourbon, while actively struggling with Maya in a way that doesn't even interrupt the conversation. It's basically heaven and earth in one place.

Scott Stenwick and Michele Montserat have also made us feel so welcome here. Michele is a fellow Taurus, and is like the sister I never knew I wanted. I feel a lot like we're the same person in different bodies all the time. Scott and I have a habit of getting drunk and playing the crowd at events that is just so much fun, verbal tag-teaming and magickal exposition for the win. We went out for dinner the other night, and it just felt so comfortable. They and their families are so sweet to hang out with.

And there's an active cell of the A.'.A.'. that can get together and talk shit about Crowley over beers without it being a formal thing, keeping our heads low at the OTO events because you can't cross the streams, and sharing the woes of the test, and Probationing, and Neophyting, and so forth and so on. I get that you don't NEED anyone more than your superior, but it's so nice to be able to be like, "OMG, lightning bolt asana, wt actual f?" and have people get it.

And the Mass! I pass out cookies as the Positive Child, or pass out wine as the Negative Child fairly regularly. I am on rotation for Deaconing, and I get to be the Sun and conjure the Dead into the Priest (that's not theologically accurate or whatever, but it's fun). I haven't forgotten the robe, cap, and crown yet, but after publishing this I'm sure it will happen soon. I'm memorizing lines for the Priest role, and gathering accoutrement, but there are things that have to happen first.

I'm eventually working my way up to Priestess, but I've got a ways to go, and there's no official OTO or EGC Gnostic Masses with a male Priestess yet, but one of these days I want to be the one who disappears for someone, just for a second. So they can see that I, too, am full of stars.

So that's my story, for folks interested in such things. How I ended up a Thelemite, dues current in the OTO and continuing my work in the A.'.A.'.. I love to tell that story, especially my first mass. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I did.

Now I'll be moving on to the things that are more important to me. The story of Soror Estai, for example, and the things she did, and the impact she had through Agape lodge, and the continuing impact she has on us all. And I'll be talking about Soror Meral, the mother of the modern OTO, and some interesting things she never bothered to mention over the years. And I'll be talking about A.'.A.'. topics, and the relationship between the Orders Crowley founded, and I'll be running my mouth about things beyond my Grade, as one is wont to do when you're dues current.

Stay tuned!

93/93

* "In the same way the Adept almost always begins by torrential lyrics painting out mystical extravagances about "ineffable love", "unimaginable bliss", "inexpressible infinities of illimitable utterness". 7 He usually loses his sense of proportion, of humour, of reality, and of sound judgment. His ego is often inflated to the bursting point, till he would be abjectly ridiculous if he were not so pitifully dangerous to himself and others. He also tends to take his new-found "truths of illumination" for the entire body of truth, and insists that they must be as valid an vital for all men as they happen to be for himself.

It is wise to keep silence about those things "unlawful to utter" which one may have heard "in the seventh heaven". This may not apply to the sixth.

The Adept must keep himself in hand, however tempted to make a new heaven and a new earth in the next few days by trumpeting his triumphs. He must give time a chance to redress his balance, sore shaken by the impact of the Infinite."

** Edit: It was definitely 2012. A friend and student of mine reminded me he joined in 2011, and I was all, "you're going through a phase," and he still makes fun of me for that. :D

Welcome to the Horns of Cerastes!

There was also an humming-bird that spake unto the horned cerastes, and prayed him for poison. And the great snake of Khem the Holy One, the royal Uræus serpent, answered him and said:

I sailed over the sky of Nu in the car called Millions-of-Years, and I saw not any creature upon Seb that was equal to me. The venom of my fang is the inheritance of my father, and of my father's father; and how shall I give it unto thee? Live thou and thy children as I and my fathers have lived, even unto an hundred millions of generations, and it may be that the mercy of the Mighty Ones may bestow upon thy children a drop of the poison of eld.

Then the humming-bird was afflicted in his spirit, and he flew unto the flowers, and it was as if naught had been spoken between them. Yet in a little while a serpent struck him that he died.

But an Ibis that meditated upon the bank of Nile the beautiful god listened and heard. And he laid aside his Ibis ways, and became as a serpent, saying Peradventure in an hundred millions of millions of generations of my children, they shall attain to a drop of the poison of the fang of the Exalted One.

And behold! ere the moon waxed thrice he became an Uræus serpent, and the poison of the fang was established in him and his seed even for ever and for ever.

- Liber LXV, Cap. V

I've spent the last nine years or so writing the Head for the Red blog, a record of my pursuit of the Philosopher's Stone. I completed that Work a couple of years ago, and as part of that completion, I found myself beginning a whole new phase of my life, this time as an ACTUAL Thelemite, instead of just a "those who call me a Thelemite wouldn't be wrong" Thelemite. I joined both the A.'.A.'. and the Ordo Templi Orientis (OTO), and I've since been studying a lot of the things Crowley wrote for the first time since I was like 18.

And not being 18 is a HUGE benefit to people studying Crowley. I know I know, everyone's a teenage Ipsissimus, but I really thought I was. Seeing it anew from the perspective I'd reached after going through the personal transformation of the Alchemical Work put everything into a totally different context.

I've made a ton of friends in the OTO, and I have a lot of things I want to talk about that relate to OTO and Magick and life in general, but I built up a pretty big audience base over the last nine years of people who are not lodge folk, and may EVEN be somewhat antagonistic towards lodges in general. I may have been antagonistic at some points myself. Once or twice.

So I don't want to be focused on topics that are not prurient to that crowd on that blog, but I still have a lot to say about the A'.A.'. and OTO materials I'm working through. So I created this blog for that purpose.

If you're one of my Thelemic friends, this will be where I make mass jokes and dabble in pestilence-centering, and comment on Thelemic Life as I see fit. I have a LOT of opinions on things related to the Orders, and this gives me the platform to speak my mind without alienating all my other friends, clients, and audience in general.

It also gives me a chance to grow a new audience, more focused on a specific aspect of my Work these days.

So WELCOME!

Let the games begin!